When I was 15 years old, I married my father’s brother. My father told me: “I’ll show you to your uncle. I hope you trust me and respect me”. I told my father: “But he is 10 years older than me, I am only 15 years old.” He said “don’t worry, I will have a wedding no one has ever seen, and I will bring you lots of presents. I will go to Sanaʽa and buy you jewelry”. My father told me that so I will agree to marry my uncle.

He loved me and I loved him.

Ratsaby: The groom?

David: No, my father.

Ratsaby: And you knew the groom?

David: He is family. When he made some money he’d give it to my mother. I said: “dear Lord, I will not break my father’s word”.

Unfortunately, two months after my engagement, my father became ill, and a week later he died from subaʿ (Influenza). My husband mourned his brother for a whole year.

In Yemen, the ḥenna ceremony was celebrated for one week. As part of the ceremony, they would use shazar, which is a black material used for decoration. It is used for making nagosh – a decoration of dots. After a week of celebration, at the end of Shabbat, I was taken to my husband’s home.

Ratsaby: How do they take you?

David: Part of the tradition is to have a parade of singing and drumming while walking from the bride’s home to her husband’s. It is called a zapa. My brothers and sisters walked me while drumming a drum that I still have today. I kept it as a souvenir for my children.

Ratsaby: What were you wearing?

David: Modest but nice clothes: embroidered trousers to the knees with a long dress covering me from neck down with silver filigran beads. Actually, on our way to Israel, we sold our clothes because we had nothing to eat.

Ratsaby: When you first arrived at the groom’s home and sat next to him, what did you do?

David: I was covered, all the way from my house to my husband’s. I was walked by those who escorted me. When I arrived there, they put a veil over my head, and I covered my face. Then the groom came, uncovers my veil, and kissed me. There was no one in the room but me and him. I only allowed him to uncover me after he paid me 2 pennies. That was part of the tradition. It is called ‘yichud’ (consummation). About a half an hour later, guests arrived.

Ratsaby: What did you do after the consummation?

David: We didn’t do anything.

Ratsaby: What did the others do? What did you all do when you arrived at the groom’s home?

David: The guests gave us wedding presents. And some money: a penny-a penny and a half. Sometimes even less.

After the gifts (rift in Arabic), we eat 'asit and samna, which is burgul, honey and oil.

David: I gave birth to a girl. It was all red and my mother thought I’m going to lose my child.

Ratsaby: There were no midwives in Yemen?

David: No. The older women deliver the young. They cut the umbilical cord, bury the placenta, and wash the mother. For a month, my sisters didn’t let me out of bed. They fed me with harish and ‘asit.

Ratsaby: What did you do if the baby doesn’t nurse?

David: In Yemen, all babies nurse.

In Israel, I told my husband to call an ambulance, but my husband said no. I told him that “if they take the child, I will be responsible. I will tell them to take me with him”. I stayed there for 3 hours and cried to the sky. I was ashamed of the people in the tent. I got into the hospital and gave birth after one hour. I was left for 10 days in the hospital. It was my third birth and I was convinced to stay at the hospital. They told me not to be afraid, and they gave him to me 3 times a day. After 10 days they took me with the ambulance back to the tent. Usually, when a woman leaves the hospital, they take the baby to a children's home, but when I got there the lady told me they were full. So I was happy to take my boy with me, I preferred that. Now it was time to give my son a brit mila. We called Avraham Sabri to be our mohel. The mohel came and examined the child. He said he was healthy, and so we gave him a brit mila. His father loved him very much.

Ratsaby: In Yemen, what does the mother do after she gives birth? How long does she stay home?

David: After birth, the mother stays home. They give her a zapa, a celebration, when she comes out. I came outside after one month. My sisters took care of me. A month after birth, they dressed me with fine clothes. After that we went to sit by a well and pumped water from there. Then we returned home and had a meal. During that month we eat 'asit, harish and samna (melted butter with honey). For lunch we eat pita bread and lachuch. An abundance of food.

During a celebration, the men and women celebrate separately. There were some women who would give the groom a ḥenna, but without men. Only the women and the groom. Then the groom would go to the men. The bride was given a ḥenna with just women. The ḥenna – songs and dances in Arabic. The men dance and sing, but the women have it more joyful. They were kneading the ḥenna, and drum.

What did they let you do when you were little?

My mother taught me straw weaving. For a living, I would weave and my husband was a blacksmith.

We sold our products to non-Jews. The Jews worked with leather and my father was a shoemaker.

The relationship with the non-Jews was good. They would give us milk and cheese. The Jews had no lands, only the Arabs did. They said that the lands belong only to the Arabs.

If the Arabs had a wedding – we would go. We were like brothers, but the Jews dressed different.

We asked them what was milk and what was meat. They would say “Allahu Akbar” – God is greater. We give you proper food.

The Imam loved the Jews. After his murder there were pogroms. He didn’t want Jews to enter the Land of Israel.

The first song is sung by the mother of the bride during the ḥenna ceremony.

The second song is sung whilst kneading the ḥenna, not whilst dancing.

The woman is singing about the pain in getting married. We cried whilst making the ḥenna for the woman. We cry when a woman leaves her father’s home. We shed tears. Women would sing and take out the pain whilst grinding the ḥenna.  

David: There were Jews who were informers. The man informed the governor and the governor sent two soldiers to our house. My mother begged: “I am a widow, have mercy on me”. The soldiers ignored her pleads. Back in the day, when my father was alive, we used to bribe the soldiers who came to our house with food. We hid the pots between the straw.

When the Imam died, the pogroms began. It was the Lord’s gift to us to come to the Land of Israel. The pogroms expedited our Aliya. I had an Arab friend who told me: “You go see Al-Quds (That’s how the Land of Israel was called), your husband will be taken, they will drown him, and you’ll be married to another.” I told her: “Don’t worry, nothing will happen.” The non-Jews didn’t want us to leave. We left, and took our Passover dishes with us, not before we separated it from our everyday dishes. We took money and almonds and raisins for our journey.

We had a layover at some non-Jews who we paid to stay overnight. The next day we kept moving. We reached camp Ḥashed in ʿAden. My daughter, Shoshana, had a fever and she was taken to a hospital. I refused to leave her, they said they will take her, but I insisted not to leave her apart.

The nurse at the immigrant camp thought I didn’t know Hebrew. I did know Hebrew, since in my childhood the synagogue was right next to my house. We used to stick our heads in the windows and recite the men’s prayer.

My daughter was 18 months old. The nurse told me: "her fever is rising because of you". I answered: "she does not have a fever, she is healthy". The nurse said: “come tomorrow at one o’clock.” We agreed. The next day I arrived. I asked the Yemenite guard to steal the child. He asked: “What if they’ll put me in jail?” I answered: “If they come to you, tell them that her mother came and started throwing stones at you, and that you were scared. Tell them I jumped on you, so you gave me my daughter and ran away.” I told him: “let them put me in jail.” He told me to come at 22:00, he intended to help me. Meanwhile the nurses are having fun drinking tea. The children are asleep. I asked the guard to cover her with a blanket, so they won’t detect her. I wrapped her with a blanket, covered her mouth with my hand, and gave the guard 2 pennies. I told the guard that no matter what, even if they’ll put me in jail, I will not give away my daughter. I wanted her with me before we move to Kibbutz Ein Shemer.

They announced that we are coming to Israel.

Ratsaby: What did you take with you on the plane?

David: I took my two children and the clothes I worn. I had jewelry, bracelets, which I sold on the way for food. The money went for the building we stayed in for 3.5 years. We came to the Land of Israel – an absolute wilderness. Where is the land of milk and honey? It took us an hour to light up Shabbat's candles.

Ratsaby: Where?

David: in Kibbutz Ein Shemer, they gave us room that was once occupied by the English. On Shabbat they gave us cheese and bread. We called it Ruthi. They gave us delicious black olives, but we weren’t used to it so we threw it away. We were there, at Ein Shemer, for 9 months. We wanted to be independent, to work ourselves. We paid money to live there, but we have children to support. I already had my son Yosef. And another family lived with us in the same tent.  

Ratsaby: Where did you wash your hands or went to the toilet?

David: The toilet was far from the tent. It was shared. There was a line of taps.

Ratsaby: Where did you have food from?

David: Many women were cooking in the dining room of the Kibbutz. My husband would go there 3 times a day.

Ratsaby: How did they know how much food to give you?

David: By the number of people stated in a card that was given to us. We were four. I was pregnant and my husband didn’t let me leave the tent. He was afraid the child will be taken away. There were rumors about children being abducted in Kibbutz Ein Shemer. I said: “I can’t give birth whilst there are other people in the tent.” We were two families sharing one tent, four members in each family, and our beds were right across from them.

Ratsaby: What did you do when a child needed the toilet?

David: I would take them. There was one beside the tents.

Ratsaby: But what if it rained?

David: We would go out. What else could we do. Once the tent-pole broke from the heavy rain. It broke on us, me and children. We only had a torch. No electricity.

Ratsaby: Who gave you a torch?

David: The government.

Ratsaby: How did you light the torch?

David: With petrol. Those who were in charge would fill it up. They took care of us.